Shucked Oysters, Jimmy Barnes and Stalking to Success

When I was a kid a ‘triple header’ consisted of watching three games of footy, eating two boxes of BBQ Shapes and God damn loving life.

These days it occurs when I have three weddings in three weekends. And it’s just as darn enjoyable.

Plus I don’t get all the digestive blockage from the BBQ Shapes.

The first kicked off with a beautiful young couple from Officer – Brittany and Mathew. They met through an ol’ fashioned method of romantic courting; stalking.

Britt would follow Mathew – who prefers to be known as ‘the big dog’ - around the school basketball courts. Mathew eventually relented, and it was the ‘big dog’ who ended up asking out Britt with a bribe of Starburst lollipops.

There’s a beautiful lesson here; not all stalkers are maniacs who have escaped from the psych ward at St Vinnies. If you’re being followed there’s obviously a good reason.

And that reason could be love.*

The second wedding took place in Mornington. The bride and groom – John and Kim – are a gorgeous, unassuming couple who I became very fond of, very quickly.

At his core John is a romantic. For their first date he wanted to take Kim somewhere as beautiful as possible. So what did he do? He took her to see Cold Chisel.

Nothing says love like Jimmy Barnes screaming right in your face.

They’ve been together ever since, despite Kim’s rally car driving skills and her fondness for Matchbox 20.

They’re a ripping duo.

The third and final ceremony took place last weekend in Bylands. The setting was crazy gorgeous, and more reminiscent of a groovy music festival.

They also had shucked oysters and man, I must have had nine or ten. They were almost as delicious as the couple themselves. Almost.

Melanie is whip-crack smart and has a lovely nature. Mike is a legend and is personable AF. He’s like that popular kid at school who everyone wants to hang with because he’s cool and has all the best video games at home (like Tony Hawk 2 on the PS1).

It was an amazing vibe and I can only imagine the shenanigans that went down during the reception.

I stayed for a bit but remembered I was going to the movies that night. For the record, Nocturnal Animals is a CRACKING movie. A terse and tense thriller. Excellent cinematography and Jake Gyllenhaal is pitch perfect. Four stars from me. Margaret?

This weekend I have one more wedding. It’s one of my besties Sam and his gorgeous wife Vic. Boy it’s gonna be fun. And once my official duties are over I’m going to grab a drink and boogie with Vic’s dad Ken.

I’m so Jennifer Love Hewitt right now (aka can’t hardly wait).

Lots of love,
Paul

*If you are being stalked don’t approach the stalker. They’re most likely maniacs who have just escaped from the psych ward at St Vinnies.